Quotes from an Emotional Cheater

Remembering it all, one bullsh*t line at a time

Category: Uncategorized

“How to avoid making the same mistakes…”

My new bible…



“Oh, my OKCupid profile?…”

“Oh, my OKCupid profile? I see it sort of the way I see Facebook, that’s why I updated it with my new information. It’s not like I’m looking to date, but I want to keep it current in case I need it later.”

(March 2012, four days after M moved to the Big City. His response to my inquiries as to why he had updated all the information on his OKCupid profile as soon as he moved to his new job and city.)

“If I have to choose between eating everything I want…”

“If I have to choose between eating everything I want and feeling totally gross afterwards, or not getting to eat everything I want–I’d definitely choose to eat everything I want, and just accept that I’m going to feel awful afterwards. There’s no question.”

[June 2011, trip to California:  Warning signs of being a cake eater]

“I think you need to just put H behind us…”

“I think you need to just put H behind us and focus on what we can do for the present.”

[June 2012. M was still spending hours with H on a daily basis, and refused to change anything he was doing with her]

“My relationship with H has nothing to do…”

” My relationship with H has nothing to do with my relationship with you…That’s why I don’t feel like what I’m doing with her is wrong.”

[June 2012]

“You sound like my mom.”

“You sound like my mom.”

[June 2012. M’s response to my asking him if he could look at me when I was talking to him so we could have an adult conversation about what was going on between him and H]

“I disagree. I think you’re an extremely jealous person.”

“I disagree. I think you’re an extremely jealous person.”

[June 2012. M in response to my telling him that I’m not normally a jealous person, which meant to me that something about his relationship with H was off]

“I’m sorry, I can’t do that.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t do that. It violates my healthy boundaries.”

[Early June, 2012. M telling me why he couldn’t either 1. spend less alone time with H late at night, or 2. communicate more of their ‘private’ conversations to me.]

“But I didn’t know…”

“But I didn’t know that’s what being committed meant.”

[Late June, 2012. M’s response to my pointing out that his words and actions didn’t match up when he would tell me how committed he was to me, but then refuse to limit his behavior, correspondence, or time with H.]

“Well, I felt at some point you were playing…”

“Well, I felt at some point you were playing with my life too.”

[Late August, 2012. M comparing everything that he’d done with H, and everything that had happened with her before and after I moved to DC, to my telling him three years prior that we should cool our friendship for a while because we weren’t on the same page]