Quotes from an Emotional Cheater

Remembering it all, one bullsh*t line at a time

Category: manipulation

“I think you need to just put H behind us…”

“I think you need to just put H behind us and focus on what we can do for the present.”

[June 2012. M was still spending hours with H on a daily basis, and refused to change anything he was doing with her]

“Maybe this is wrong to be thinking…”

“Maybe this is wrong to be thinking this way, but I keep hoping that when all this is over, someday, you’ll be there waiting on the other side of it all.”

[July 2, 2012, the day M asks me for a ‘trial breakup’, and then waffles on it]

“…On the contrary, I think that my taking a risk…”

“…On the contrary, I think that my taking a risk and asking you to come and live with me, and actually going through with the move, is proof of just how dedicated and committed I was to us, and to making this work.”

[June, 2012]

“You sound like my mom.”

“You sound like my mom.”

[June 2012. M’s response to my asking him if he could look at me when I was talking to him so we could have an adult conversation about what was going on between him and H]

“I disagree. I think you’re an extremely jealous person.”

“I disagree. I think you’re an extremely jealous person.”

[June 2012. M in response to my telling him that I’m not normally a jealous person, which meant to me that something about his relationship with H was off]

“I see it as a matter of maintaining…”

“I see it as a matter of maintaining healthy boundaries with all my relationships. That’s why I can’t do what you’re asking for from me regarding H.”

[June, 2012]

“You keep saying I’m keeping secrets…”

“You keep saying I’m keeping secrets, but I don’t think of it as secrets. It’s sensitive information that has nothing to do with you, and isn’t useful for you to know.”

[June, 2012]

“You’ve said that you think…”

“You’ve said that you think I’m actually jealous of my douchebag cousin because I secretly want to act like him, but I disagree. I’m actually a nice guy, unlike him. I would never treat women as badly as he does… I actually respect women and try to understand them, not just use them.”

[June-ish, 2012]

“But I didn’t know…”

“But I didn’t know that’s what being committed meant.”

[Late June, 2012. M’s response to my pointing out that his words and actions didn’t match up when he would tell me how committed he was to me, but then refuse to limit his behavior, correspondence, or time with H.]

“THOSE e-mails that H and I sent?”

THOSE e-mails that H and I sent? I don’t consider those sexual at all. …I consider that as just ‘witty banter’. I need outlets for ‘witty banter’ in my life. I think we are never going to see eye-to-eye on this.”

[September, 2012]